My Old Man

[Geek44]

My father was born in Helsinki, Finland in 1935. While he never served during the WW2 period, he was profoundly touched by the war. He spoke of several experiences but not deeply. I know for certain that as a child, his life was in danger several times, mostly from Soviet aerial bombing. He told me once that a VVS aircraft crashed near the entrance of the shelter he was in with his mother. He said they fished aircraft parts out of a nearby lake for years after. He also claims he was once strafed by a single Russian plane, but by the time I was old enough to understand such tales, he was already an alcoholic. Once, when he was pretty under the weather, he cried as he told me he'd happened upon the Helsinki cinema after a direct hit. He spoke of bodies and blood in the gutter. He said he vomited from the smell of it. Keep in mind he can't have been older than nine or ten at the time.
It was my mother's opinion (she was an alcoholic too) that Dad suffered post traumatic stress disorder and it's my opinion that this is what turned him to drink. Over the years, the bottle got between me and my father and there are parts of me that understand why, but also parts that are still angry about it. He died in 2006 in a nursing home at the age of 71 six months after my mother died. I never shed a tear.
I include this post here and these photos of him. I'm starting to work at repairing the relationship he and I once had. He was such a great Dad before the drink had him. Devoted, kind and gentle. I adored him. As he slowly slipped away from me, my fear and confusion turned to anger. I was 14 when I finally understood what was wrong with my parents...I was always just afraid. So this is me making peace with his ghost. I've got my own kids now and harbouring negativity for my Dad is something my family doesn't need. Thanks for the outlet.
TGSchwanck.jpg

DadArmyGroup1.jpg

These pics were taken during National Service in the mid 1950s. He was living in Sweden at the time apprenticed to a jeweller. He returned home for his service and to visit his own father. He was an anti-aircraft crew member. I have pics somewhere here of them with their old Soviet anti-tank rifles. He said he had some rank, maybe Sergeant or similar...he was in for two years. In the bottom pic, my Dad is the guy front row, second from the left. Sorry it's so small...the original is tiny.
Peace.

[gi-rene]

Thanks Geek and I hope this outlet helps you!

[Panzermacher]

A touching story Nick. I am glad you are rebuilding the bridge. And to your Old Man....Prosit!

[Pylon1357]

Very touching story of your relationship with your father. It has been said that person who has the most profound impact on our lives is our father.

It's very good to hear you are making amends and moving on. Kids have that effect on us.

[cyberia]

Peace to you and your Dad. Thanks for sharing, my friend.

[Jim O]

Thank you for sharing. It illustrates the point that war touches civilian populations in various ways, even years later.

[Geek44]

Originally Posted by gi-rene

Thanks Geek and I hope this outlet helps you!

Thanks all.
Yeah Richard, it's helped a bit. Peace.

[Commander Waffle]

Wow, I can relate to some of that. Sorry to hear some of it, yet glad to hear the rest.

[Geek44]

Sometimes I think life is a tragedy shot through with brief flashes of joy. The story above doesn't really contain anything remarkable or exceptional. I can look around, sometimes not even very far, and see many, many who's lives are less fortunate, filled with sadness and suffering. I've broken a lot of cycles during my life and while I'm far from perfect, I'm continually working on it. Sometimes the work is very hard, sometimes I need help...all I can do is laugh at myself and try not to beat myself up too much. It's funny...with the small wisdom I've gained through hard times and some suffering, the thing I've learned about myself is this; I find empathy for strangers easier than empathy for those closest to me including myself. Still, life goes on for me and I consider myself very lucky. I have a beautiful partner who really loves me and two beautiful kids. The rest is a bonus.
Peace.

[Commander Waffle]

Prefection is a term applying to humans, Nick. Prefection only is the Lord (or some other equivalant). If we were perfect...what fun would it be? ...Pretty dull. We all are normal in our own ways and prefect in our own ways.